On Internet Addictions

April 16, 2007

in Confusion

One of the secondary consequences of moving into my new digs at Mercury Studios is that my laptop stays there in the evenings and the weekends. In a mere week, this has improved the moods of my wife and daughter, raised my dog’s ears, improved the countenance of my kitchen, and even shrunk the always growing pile of books by my bed.

I knew that I had problem, but the extent of it didn’t hit me until the computer was gone for a few days. I use the Internet much like my father used the T.V. when I was young, something which I always hated him for–he tuned out everything and channel surfed, watching shows that clearly bored the hell out of him. Seeing your father waste his time like this, instead of say, playing with you, permanently altered my relationship with him.

What I do on the Internet is identical. It’s terribly boring stuff that I tune out to: I’ll read arcane sports article after arcane sports article on Sportsline.com, despite the fact that I couldn’t care less about who the new basketball coach is at Wichita State; or I’ll read all the comments on Steve Master’s hurricane blog on wunderground.com, despite the fact that I live in Portland, Oregon, and don’t have even a passing interest in meteorology.

What I hate the most about my addiction is how hollow it is. People who are addicted to WoW are at least addicted to something interesting that there’s some sort of community around. Hell, their kids might even think it’s cool. My addiction is far more nihilistic. It’s really a big fuck-you to my very existence.

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