On Giving My Laptop a Vasectomy

December 29, 2008

in Writing Process

I have an Internet addiction. In fact, I wrote an entire novel about Internet addiction. You would think, after several years, I would have developed the proper coping mechanism for said addiction, but alas, I have not.

And so, during a particularly devastating period of writers’ block, in which procrastination levels, and thus Web surfing, were redlining, I bought a precision screwdriver set and played a game of Operation with my laptop.

I followed some random instructions that I found online, cracked it open, removed the internal wireless card, put Band-aids (electrical tape) around the two loose leads, and closed up the machine. The operation was surprisingly uneventful and successful, and I have been going to coffee shops with the eunuch ever since, my writers’ block gone and my spirits elevated. Addiction-free.

It seems like there’s a moral to this story, but it’s not coming to me right now. Maybe, someone can suggest one in the comments…

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